Friday, June 2, 2017

"Wonder Woman" (2017)



For the record, ladies...for Hallowe'en this year, you don't have to go as Slutty Wonder Woman, just say Wonder Woman, we'll fill in the rest (hopefully)

A lot is going to be said about how sexy and aggressive and casting from the heavens Gal Gadot is as Wonder Woman/Diana Prince. And they aren't wrong. In fact, I say very much underrated. Though the movie is surprisingly stupid. I mean, REALLY dumb. For instance, having an alter identity when everyone knows what you look like. Also...throwing a guy through a table in the bar raises zero suspicion from the rest of the bar. I mean, they actually go back to drinking. So why did I enjoy this movie so much? Because it is without a single ounce of shame. It knows the wild set up it needs to go through, sets up absolutely nothing but wants you to like it so bad. It panders to women's lib like some rabid bitch in heat. And it makes no subtle hints at how silly it can be. And I have zero doubt...director Patty Jenkins is confused as to how she got away with it.

The story written by Zack Snyder, Allan Heinberg, Jason Fuchs and written by Allan Heinberg from characters created by William Moulton Marston starts off in some remote hidden island of Themyscira. Let's face it, it's Utopia. Women upon women who train in gladiator outfits talking weird talk and being sexy. There are no men in the island because...well, it's part of the lore. Diana as a child is desperate to learn how to fight. Her mother Hippolyta (Connie Nielsen) desperately wants her not to. As she knows a secret of what her true destiny may be. Secretly Hippolyta's sister Antiope (Robin Wright) trains her. Which becomes this very pedestrian test of wills. Child begs and pleads, mother relents. It's very...easy. And unfortunately the weakest link in the chain. The call to adventure is so...without effort.


The awful outside world literally plummets from the heavens when spy Steve Trevor (Chris Pine) falls through the invisible barrier and into the ocean to be rescued by a now grown up Diana. It is the first time she has laid eyes on a man in the flesh. They patch him up, but not before a mini-war happens between soldiers that were chasing Trevor, which results in some real tragedy.

Diana then decides to end the war by killing the God of War, Ares. Trevor thinks she's silly but brings her along to London to gather a raid party against a true villain in Lundenhoff. A power mad German who elicits the help of Dr. Maru (Elena Anaya) a chemical engineer whose grotesque face is covered by an exo-skin and is fixated on developing the perfect chemical weapon.

What is mostly discussed in this movie is the thought of war and what it does to the planet. It is a loud call for peace though, it's hard to take seriously when she's kicking so much ass. Most of which, these soldiers don't survive her wrath. What is thrilling, is when she is Diana Prince in disguise. She is endearing and naive. Much like Superman, he is a stranger in a strange land and has no clue why the world acts so chaotic. She gets a first hand look running from trench to trench in a heart swelling moment when Wonder Woman finally shows in all her splendor.
Look, the costume is super corny, but she makes it work. Like REALLY work. As she marches down gunfire, you forget this is silly. She bats away bullets. Which...I mean, you should have at least one German look as his gun like he was going nuts and toss out a flask of booze. But...I guess it's not that kind of movie. It's a movie where when you see Gal smack guys around, you do get a chubby and when she gets smacked around you also get wood. Win-win.

Overall, Gal really makes the movie work. I forgot that overwhelming message of women power, and had a good time because it's her unawareness of the material. Much like Arnold Schwarzenegger, she just wants you to have a good time and will do everything to make it so. There isn't a cynical bone in her body over it. And that sweetness just feels right. I know despite that this movie is a strong agenda towards female action movies, it is kind-hearted in the end, and nothing wrong with that.

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