Post Hollywood

If you ever make it out to Hollywood and had been here before in...say the turn of the millenium, you're going to notice a wild difference. High rises have taken over and the old Hollywood is being...killed off.
Really fitting, since we discovered what Hollywood was at on the inside...weak structurally, weak morally.
We discovered that it DID need money to survive.
Remember the hippies of the 60's. Most are these corporate assholes who are destroying the old buildings for the new. Why? Because they're phonies. As they were decades ago. EXCEPT, the false sense of morality was never apparent as it is now.
Cleaning up Hollywood means more than we realize. The world wants you to embrace your individuality in light of the new movement of being "woke" to causes. A new LGBT campus is on our block and it is BEAUTIFUL. The building. The freaks who satellite it are still the shit show you imagine. And it's not because I'm a closed minded bigot, but because there is NOTHING good that happens at 3AM and that's when you see them the most. Ostracized by some community that would not accept pink hair with thousands of piercings. That's what standing firm to your beliefs brings you...homeless.
But I get what you may be thinking, YOU'RE standing firm on the old Hollywood.
Yes! Old Hollywood embraced these freaks. They loved that crazy behavior, but they also understood that they are freaks. And the freaks understood they were freaks. And it was a nice QUIET understanding. Versus one of these freaks feeling entitled. That is the worst. When freaks believe they deserve things (and boy do they).

Hollywood has that bi-polar quality. It wants to be kind to oddities but remains steadfast in not wanting to be perverts. Sorry, EVERYONE is pervy regardless of religion or sex or race. That's what bound us. And that's what bound Hollywood. I wish everyone who came to Hollywood just acknowledged this. That we like big tits, big oiled up muscles, and we wanted power so we could attract those things.
Instead, the false front of morality.
The world has become topsy turvy where the Left want MORE censorship and the RIGHT want LESS.
Poor Hollywood is caught in the middle of trying to create something that doesn't offend either.

Failure To Launch

I am always enamored with people who go out there and make something. In this case, a feature movie.

It's always been a goal to finish a full 90+ minute feature, and though I have a few scripts none of which I can afford to make...in Los Angeles.
Now I'm no quitter, but sometimes, it feels like I've let myself down because I let L.A. get to me.

I recently listened to a podcast with cinematographer Caleb Deschanel. He is incredibly prolific having shot "The Right Stuff" and "The Black Stallion." He is of the old guard who believes in the independent spirit. He was once told that movies aren't about art. You think it is, you will sabotage yourself. Instead, movies are about...getting it done. Regardless of adversity, permission or resources. The point is to JUST MAKE IT.
That was incredibly profound to me, because film school had given us the tools to do it...like we had resources. The ones who seem to succeed in this business...see no resources...but still do it.

That is a great message to all. That there is nothing in the way of making anything unless you talk your way into it.

Now people who know me know I hate being on set. Some would even assume I hate making movies. But I don't. I do hate being on set. Because it's uncontrollable chaos. Which, typically, I don't mind. Who doesn't like a pie fight? BUT, what I don't like is confrontations or tap dancing. Sometimes, being a silver tongue devil moves you further here than anything else. In fact, I'd say...most of the time.
A person who is good with people will succeed. Something they don't teach you in film school. And judging by my classmates (of 1998) most are introverted weirdos. Most are more film fans than film makers. A lot have gone into teaching.

The point is that you make it, to steal from Malcolm X, by any means necessary.

And I think the east coast people understand this better than the west coast.
I sometimes believe that making a movie in Ohio would be simpler because people aren't as uptight about the things we do here. In fact, a lot are fascinated or want to be involved, because it is a foreign craft. Some are incredibly savvy and it's damn near difficult to find that seriousness. But they are there. In every city. Everyone wants to act. Everyone. And I've met so very few people, if you ask, wouldn't want to participate.
And that is a liberating feel.
Onward, my friends.

The Lottery

Have you heard people say "One day when I win the lottery..."
Not to be a dick, but those are losers.
They think money will solve all their problems. It solves one...the need to not be under the thumb of debt.

The issue...people who say this...most likely don't want to be around humanity. The wave of humanity descends upon you when you win the lottery. Because everyone else thinks money solves their problems.

Now, I get it...you probably think "Fuck you man, for someone who lives comfortably, saying you don't need money is bullshit." I'd answer by telling them...I worked hard. Well...hard-ish.

I am not remotely rich. I am comfortable. Meaning I have a place to stay and something to eat. Not that far removed from a simple homeless man. Though I have a few other assets..but...not really that much more.

I prefer to earn my money. Not by luck. Yeah, a lot of you would consider me an idiot for saying so...but here's the deal...imagine what you are actually winning. The hopes and dreams of millions of people. You inherit a LOT of disappointment. I prefer not to be haunted by that thought. Along with that a great deal of resentment from people who don't think you deserve any of it.

I don't appreciate money as it is now. I appreciate what it means for other people. If I were a sound businessman...at this point I'd be incredibly rich. Because if you're job is to make money, and you are focused on it...you will make it. It also takes sacrificing a lot. This is when you truly understand how little it means to you but to others. But by then, will you care?

Focus on enrichments in life that require not winning the lottery.

To The Newbs

If you been here, in Hollywood long enough, you will start to see new faces. These are hopeful people hoping to grab the brass ring. A lot of determined people. And many with a TON of talent. More prettier, smarter and wealthier than you to begin with. A lot of the ol' timers will laugh because...well, they know the odds. Most will fizzle out before the 5 year break.
Most like seeing these faces to exploit them. Though I didn't see it THAT much, there are producers who have raked in these fresh off the boat kids to work on their production with false hopes of...whatever. I tend to constantly repeat that they are on a shit cruise so they better have brought Dramamine. This is to make sure they know what they did to themselves. Fuck your positivity that serves no one.

If they still decide to come aboard, I am eternally grateful. Trust me, though I pay them little or not at all, I make sure they don't suffer the same bullshit I had. Because being on set sucks. Wait, backtrack, being on set sucked for me.

I'm not sure how this was a thing, but there are people who thrive being around so much hurry up and wait. Guess what? There's the military. In my efficiency mind, there is SO much waste. But it all makes sense when you go to dailies. I dunno, there's something to be said about blind luck.

I think what most people enjoy is organized chaos. A film set is a buzz of energy (at least when they're shooting). The rest of the time, it's sitting around waiting for something. Every production I've ever been on, it's a lot of waiting for something. Sometimes you know what it is, most of the times you don't. And if you're a newbie, that makes you a production assistant that has to lock down a set. Glamorous? Not really, it means you stand at one of end of the sidewalk with a walkie talkie holding the public away from walking in a public space. Grateful I've never had to do that. I know some who tell me about holding off traffic until a shot is done. You want to know what makes Angelenos more irate than anything is traffic. And it's getting worse with newbies coming into town every day.
That's the worst of it. Population. No other city has this many people coming in daily. Possibly New York. But, here, skyrises are being built to accommodate the flood of people.

And it made me wonder why people even want to come to L.A. to do movies. They can do them anywhere, get great locations and so forth.

A friend explained that it was because the talent pool in his small town was non-existent. L.A. obviously have people who are out here strictly to act. So the congregation of talent pools here and the competitive nature amplifies their skill. The other idea is that, this is still the town that has a history of excellence. Regardless of the shit they put out now, Hollywood is still seen as the Mecca of movies. This is where it was born (not movies per se but movies the way they are seen now). And for a lot of people to conquer it between the best of the best is a badge of honor. That they were able to stand toe-to-toe in the shadow of Griffith, Ford, Victor Fleming, and so forth is the ultimate goal. This is a boxer's mentality. No point in doing it, if you aren't fighting with the best.

And, to be completely honest, I see more K.O.'s than wins.
But that doesn't mean you don't dust yourself off and try again. It's a grueling pit and if I were to be asked how I survived in Hollywood. I'd give them the same look someone gave me when I asked him that years ago. I was given a thousand yard stare and a half smirk and a simple phrase "everyone is different, and everyone does it differently." Chilling.

Hollywood Before The Internet

A lot of you will probably never know what it was like before the internet and working in Hollywood.
I pity you. The place was magically sleazy.

In a strange way, I feel EXTREMELY privileged not to have known everything that was out there. Most people, and that is the world, were perfectly fine with clips of people doing dumb things. Most of us put our hands up like "why bother?" When something like that occurs, you just can't pinpoint your way into the industry. I see it today, a LOT of people are perfectly fine making their short flicks on their phones and uploading. A LOT have gotten incredibly sophisticated and those are the people who have carved a niche for themselves when Hollywood shut their doors.

I have a love/hate thing with the studios. That system (and still is) is meant to be a gatekeeper. In other words, the popular kids get in, you get stay out. It certainly what you wouldn't consider fair, but it took a lot to get in, even more to stay in. That's where the sexual assaults and such happened. They knew they could ruin careers. Baffles me why most women didn't stand up then, but now over-exert their accusation cards now. It happens to gay actors as well. They seem to be willing to pay the price and has been silent.

The internet pre-internet you see now was still a fantastic place. I actually lived in Hollywood. At Van Ness And Hollywood Boulevard. I thought I'd made it...in a single bedroom apartment that smelled like wet dog (if you YouTube my short film "Nicki Sweet" you will see the location. I loved it. I had a girlfriend visit that shithole. We slept on the mattress in the living room, and I'm sure she fondly remembers those times as well. Young and not distracted by anything but the mystery of Tinsel Town.

Today, due mostly to the internet, the sense of tradition seems to be...corny. They use to broadcast stars getting stars on the Walk of Fame. It doesn't happen as much anymore. Most of the public thinks it's trite. It's, at most, a clipped video. Been a while since I saw anyone putting their hands and feet at Grauman's Chinese Theater.

Hollywood before the internet also didn't guide the product we're getting now. We've gone pretty ridiculous. Where we once packed theaters to watch family dynamics story...it's now loud superheroes. Which tend to draw a crowd of talkers to the audience (fuck you and the shit hole you come from). The internet has a sounding board for all, apparently they bring that into the theater.

If you see much chaos in the world, it is most likely because the internet stimulates and prods in the worst way possible. Instead, our minds are meant to be quiet and meditative. We are bombarded with fast paced images. We can't have silence in our noggins, since the internet.

I can't bad mouth a thing that has given freedom to some unspoken voice in cinema. Particularly the motion picture film community (the people who don't shoot digitally). These filmmakers found a platform that didn't require you fulfill the studio systems game and circumvented it regardless of their decisions on what to shoot on (granted watching film on digital is pretty shitty). This community does the most interesting work, and that is a benefit I can attribute to the internet. We are able to reach out and have this community. Which, for the most part, has become my real community. I've met a lot of people who shoot on film. This wasn't a thing, had there been no internet.

Tale Of Two Heathers

Who didn't have a crush on Heather Locklear?

Fresh faced, girl next door.
Too bad she became a literal car wreck. Plead guilty to 17 misdemeanors. In other words, slap on the wrist.

She obviously needs help. Probably needed help back in the 80's when she was probably mauled by her co-stars or producers or...well...whomever. Because she was the new Farrah Fawcett (also a wreck).
The question being...
why can't these girls find a guy who is NORMAL.

They went with rockers and actors. That's never healthy. It's common knowledge. The entertainment business in general, to be fair. But...a rock star is as dumb as you can make it. So it's hard to feel bad for someone who is attracted to these types and then emotionally tears apart their family. Obviously there is help.

The other thing to mention is that...life moves on. We're all getting old. I'm sure as a People Magazine Most Beautiful person can make you think back at 50 what great times they were when everyone fell over themselves to see you. To regain that is...really scary. Look at Faye Dunaway. This sense of wanting to be youthful to be valued isn't society's fault if you come to terms that it's a biological thing, and if you fight Mother Nature, she will fight back.

Many of these women who end up with anyone in the entertainment business, yeah, fun for a while but settle down for a quieter life. You don't have to end up in the headlines.

Of note, I was a bigger fan of Heather Thomas. For one thing, my name is in her name. And I always liked her face more. She was Scarlett Johansson of her day, just not as well known because of the other Heather.

Sadist Auteur

I'm not sure which director said it, but he said that most horror directors have a sadistic side to them. Funny that they are also THE most nicest people you ever met. I've seen Tobe Hooper come by a cigar shop to quietly buy smokes (before his death, obviously). John Carpenter seems like someone's curmudgeon uncle (though you could argue he was more a disciple of westerns. Hitchcock wasn't a nice guy though. I guess you could argue that stylists are different. I really consider Mr. Hitchcock more of a fashion director (though to be fair, most of that came after the fact.

I can't do it. May never get to that point. In other words, I have no interest in seeing random acts of violence anymore. I think as you grow older you see how futile that really is.

I am really surprised that I see more women getting in horror than men. I think it has to do with living in fear. I understand. Girls who are pretty get a lot of unnecessary attention all the time. They are fascinated with victims because they are one constantly...I guess.

To me, I think most of the directors who make horror films is an entry level thing to get into directing their own projects. People ask what makes a successful director. I agree with this answer I've heard in the past..
...if that filmmaker is curious about the subject matter they are making and don't know everything about it and are passionate to learn from it. It's a longer version of "make what you know" but it goes a little further back to "make what you like to know." In this discovery you learn more about yourself.
Who knows, you may learn you are a sadist.

Result Based

It's probably near impossible for people in the film industry to not link money with success. No judgement there. That's the clear result of having a product people want. To me, it's foolhardy as an artist to focus on result based stories.
For the most part, you ask any screenwriter, they aren't looking at what audiences want. Some are, of course, and you can see it, in storylines that seem to shoehorn hidden things for their fans. This is pandering and distracting from a good story (in my opinion).
There is an incredibly rare occasion now where movies aren't sequels or adaptions or reboots. Trying to limit return on investments. They have people to answer to. "Once Upon A Time In Hollywood" is the only film for a LONG time that has broken the $100 million mark and was an original story. That is bizarre.

IF that is the life you want to live, I'll cheer from the crowd and go home and eat mac and cheese.
To me, this is an empty shell.
Result base makes people worry constantly about how people will perceive their art. And I'm not saying I'm not guilty of it. You want to dress to impress. And also not look the fool. But to me...maybe because my brain has been foggy for a while, it doesn't interest me as much anymore.
The freedom to make things...ANYTHING, makes the pressure non-existent. Perhaps that is what I'm dodging. A LOT of people live in awful pressure. One project I'm assisting in now has the cinematographer stressed beyond what I want to deal with. I applaud her for fighting for her art, though  maybe not on a Hollywood franchise now.

Buy your freedom, then make what you want. Don't let the audience tell you what you want. Give them something original and be brave!

Dull And Lifeless Directors

There is a co-worker of mine who wants to direct movies. He reminds me very much of the guy who trained me at my job now. They're both technically proficient to a level of mad scientist genius but seem to lack social nuances to be interesting. I suspect they each want to get into making movies to get girls that treated them like shit in high school to trip over themselves at their feet. Most of us do.

He's made three features, none of them I've been invited to see. Though I know he's made them because I've seen clips and he has no reason to lie to me. They're really...stiff projects. He lacks the free flow that is required of movies I prefer watching. I can also tell much of it is a chore and his stories aren't very interesting.

I think, much like a LOT of technically proficient people, he lacks...spirit. Spirit in filmmaking is the love of cinema. I suspect he likes to dissect them into its base and...well, there goes the fun. I have a friend who is against "tastes." I think this is an inkling of what I think he means. Most people who think they have taste REALLY mean they are discerning with their precious time and that type of snobbery of not seeing the good come from schlock is a detriment to anyone who wants to tell stories. There is a value to most everything.

I staunchly disagree with this co-worker's way of working. Which is probably closer to how the studios work. Though he is (obviously an independent). The guy hasn't bent to the realities of his paycheck and his films may reflect that. Studio movies to me means you can't experiment haphazardly. More times than not, filmmaking is a reckless endeavor, and the person behind the camera is more a stylist than a storyteller. I have these filmmaking friends who've attached not the correct lens on a camera which cause about half of their shots to be out of focus, the other half have horrific vignetting. I've reminded them multiple times, but it hasn't stopped them.
I LOVE THAT!
Because, truth be told, I'd rather be a compromise between that and some technical proficiencies rather than choke the fun out of filmmaking. WAY too many technicians today (due to the digital era) than filmmakers. They count on the wrong things to make their movie.
And to be fair, I think my way of making a film isn't for everyone either. If I were to say, I do enjoy my approach better than stressing over dumb minutiae.

Bigots

Here, in Los Angeles, there are more conservative people than you realize. They probably come from Central California where they wanted to see and live "in the big city."
There is a sense of right and wrong when it comes to humanity. But it seemed during President Barack Obama's 8 years, he gave all people the license to commit crimes and get away with it. Guess what? This is the same exact rhetoric that is being screamed about when Blacks and Mexicans and Leftist Whites are saying President Donald Trump enables White Supremacists.

Either may be true actually. There are dumb people in the world. But the news out there now doesn't help. It picks and chooses what to enrage us with. In reality, most of us still live that life from 1980's where everything was carefree. I ask a normal 8 year old how her life is, it's not different than how I grew up. I'm not sure the parents of today share their political views that openly with their children, mine didn't. I know one who does. He is a staunch Leftists and I pity the boy. Seriously, that kid will grow up to be a far Right Conservative. Trust me.

So who are bigots?
Answer: we are.
People deny they aren't but EVERYONE is.
Now this may seem like an accusatory thing to write, but it's true. We have our prejudices. Some won't date Blacks, some won't date White, some won't date Mexicans, some won't Asians. Now, extreme people will scream that bigoted. Which, in a way, it is. It is a prejudice based on skin color and nothing else. Perhaps culture. But that still falls under bigotry. If I said I would never go out with a Mexican girl. And the public were to overhear that. The internet (if they cared about who I was) would take that information and run. Because it's sensational. To a LOT of humans, I chalk that up to preference. To a lot of outraged people, it's bigoted. Instead, people then lie. Which makes them out to be phony. And so forth.

To be progressive isn't to deny our biology. It's to know it and change within. If not, then that's YOUR decision, as long as you don't hurt others physically. Yeah, you probably do so emotionally. But we need to stop living in that world. Not that you can't feel, but not everyone who doesn't like you is a bigot. It was my go-to for the longest time. They couldn't possibly not like me. Turns out I was just being a shit.

Shooting Off The Cuff

The biggest crew I ever worked with was about 200 people. That is a LOT of people. Most I didn't see since I was always in the production trailer, nursing a hangover or pissed off at how slow 200 people are. I may seem like a oksie-folksie guy when you meet me in person BUT, on set, that was..well, I was much of a angry tyrant. I see that now. Not a tyrant, but...I always saw inefficient waste. I argued a lot of things. Much of it had nothing to do with the movie I was shooting at the time (I only been on 2 features). They were things like the use of time (which I suppose could be linked to the feature). People generally didn't listen as to where they should park the trucks or which camera we were using. Or where our lens kit we ordered was. It was intense sometimes because I thought the stress would kill the producer. It killed me just having to coordinate my camera crew (which really wasn't my job but...you can't help that). Most of the time my crew were talking me off the ledge.

So, for those of you who dream of working in big bad studio Hollywood, please etch this in your mind...it is a job. You are employed. They want you to fill out paperwork. Then there's the drudgery of 14 hour days. 12 hour days are considered normal (by the way). I had no idea 8 hours was what normal people did for the longest time. In production good luck with 12 or 14, some have gone even more. And it's all a waste of dumb time. No one wants to deal with dumb time, except teamsters. They get paid regardless of how dumb you are about your time.

That's why I prefer THE least amount of people on set. Which isn't always feasible in a union set up. A well tuned crew, such as the one Clint Eastwood uses regularly is impressive. They (most likely) speak very little and work very fast. The ones you get when starting out, know very little about what's going on (because they don't read their call sheets) or they're just too green and film school arrogant to hustle their asses off on set.

That said, the shoots I put together now are the ones I prefer. I actually got down to just me as camera, lighting and sound. Which is documentary style-ish. Since we were making a narrative film. I loved it! Though I couldn't function as a receptive human being to "directing." when I'm thinking of 100 other things such as sound levels or whatnot. Yes, in a consumer audience, this is a VERY poor example of giving the audience what they paid for. To me...I don't care. It doesn't register like that. And if ANYTHING comes of it, I'm happy. If NOT, I'm not sad.
Also, I shoot on film, which adds another level of paranoia.
If you've ever been around camera technicians, they check, cross check and check again. When an unfortunate accident happens on set with the camera, they are...well, it's amazing how utter destroyed they are because it calls into question their skills and reputation.
In the industry, the stakes are pretty high in dollar amounts. This stress isn't what you should be concerned about. Nor should you ever.
This is a reckless way to work...but...somehow, I prefer it.

Et Tu, Dayton?

Most likely a racist dude wanted to kill people of color. And Dayton, OH was his hunting ground. I can't believe within 14 hours ANOTHER mass shooting took the lives of 9 more people.
In this unprecedented mass shooting culture we've found ourselves at, what is the solution?
To be honest, I don't know. What I do know is that this is an old crisis we continue to re-visit every time we turn on the internet, we're reading ANOTHER mass shooter. Where can we go where this doesn't happen? They have hit the soft targets.

I am at a loss for words in terms of how to end this ugliness. My only solution is to let parents parent again. I've been seeing an alarming amount of people who just allow their children free reign. This is horrid. And I do blame my generation. Since we're the ones who shrugged off responsibility and accountability first. Then attempted to make our lives much easier with technology. Then allowed technology to determine what outrage we need in a day.

To me, this is unacceptable, IRRESPONSIBLE and so very tragic. In the case of these two assholes who wanted to prove a point, why not kill yourselves first? Seems you are miserable in life and had not thought that your actions effect countless of future problems ahead. You're nutbag gun loving brethren for example. EVERYONE should drop a hammer on these types. And there is a specific type in these mass shootings. Young and White. There, I said it. Just pointing out the obvious here, but look...after writing this, I'm sure a Latina Woman in her 50's will go all apeshit. Because...we can't control our so-called "good guys with guns." Yes, I understand GUNS DO NOT KILL PEOPLE, people kill people. But it sure makes it easy for nutbags to take many people out. People lack common sense when they argue that knives do the same. You idiots are the same who say "don't bring a knife to a gunfight" Know why you retards say that? Because you know how destructive guns are.

You don't NEED a gun. That also goes for these asshole gang members that continue the neverending destruction of life. If it were my police force, anyone that even has a gang tattoo would be put down like the dogs they are. Every single one. Then move on from there.
But most of their hands are tied.
How sad we need to speak of this.

El Paso Shooting

I need to apologize on behalf of Hollywood.
They won't say it because they'll blame guns. I blame violence. Reckless, head smashing desensitizing laughable violence.
And it's awful.
For Caucasian men between the ages of 19 and 36 and that one Asian at Virginia Tech, please don't ever get a gun, don't ever have a gun anywhere near you and don't ever think about a gun. Regardless of the hate you have in your heart, or...as you probably convince yourselves that you can handle your shit...you can't. Burn in fucking Hell. Because you can't handle shit.
People have to know certain things about themselves, for instance why I will NEVER own a gun. Recently, I have considered it, since where I live has been getting a lot of horrible crime. But I know that I have a disgusted streak on humanity that requires I don't ever need a firearm.

And yeah, gun nuts will call me retarded. But, how can I set an example without following it.

Violence has been shown in Hollywood in the most awful ways. And I'm not entirely sure people TRULY see the anguish it causes. Lives are destroyed. People will need to move on from awful grief. My short rub with death recently has shown me how destructive a void creates. And, look, I'm probably saying this to deaf ears.

We are meant to die in our beds (hopefully under some young tits). NOT in a Wal-Mart gunned down by a virgin asshole. I am so sickened now, by what my industry has created. Violence against people in real life doesn't have a do-over. That is the end. And we need to feel empathy for this.
Please, consider this.

More Thoughts On Your Entry Into Hollywood

The reality of making movies in this town is that there are the same gatekeepers that will build walls to keep you out. Though there are PLENTY of avenues to do your own thing, somehow people think success means you have to work within their system. I don't like the new system, maybe you do. I've grown to hate superhero event movies. Which, the higher budgeted ones are. These aren't as glamourous when it comes to the reality. Everything is one big gear, and you are a hired hand, or cog. You get very little say in what is actually being made. But you get paid a lot. All fine until you realize you are at their mercy. If this is the path you wish to take...then more power to you.

But I think most of you out here are much more autonomous than that. You want to tell YOUR story. And you should. Most people don't (or haven't) found their voice yet. That comes with a ton of mistakes. And ones you will need to make. Some get heavy handed with them in order to be taken seriously. And you should be.

Many people have reported back to me (as they are out there hustling to their next gig) that they need stability now. The movie industry is...well, if you aren't part of the machine, you are going to burn out at some point. Dissatisfaction with what is being made, or how it's made. That's why when a film like "The Lighthouse" is announced, people get excited. It's different, and people are wondering how an American black and white film even can get funding.

To be honest, nothing is easy. And if you haven't a reputation, no one will ride your trend. And trends are what Hollywood thrives on (always has been).

I feel VERY fortunate to do what I do. And also have this freedom to create and make mistakes (though at my own expense). That's fine. I also like talking to younger people. Just because it renews my faith in what's ahead. But more importantly that they are the ones who I remind can do it on their own terms. Through their hopes, often misguided, I tend to offer a soft landing. The reality is that most won't make it in the way they want. Which isn't a bad thing. You will find your place, if you stick it out. Hopefully you won't be too exhausted to enjoy it when you get there.