What type of fucking mo-mo do you have to be to use the hand drawer to dry your nut-sack? It got so bad at this ghetto L.A. Fitness they had to put up a sign. "Hand Dryers are to be used only to dry hands" I'm not kidding. It was printed, so they had to go to some company and have them print it. Can you imagine having to explain this?
"So I need a sign"
"Yeah, whatcha' want it to say?"
"Hand dryer is to be used only to dry hands"
"Okay, we charge by the letter, you sure this is important enough? I mean, pretty obvious."
"You would think. But we're getting the smell of burning pubes and boiled smegma."
"Oh yeah...that's terrible."
"Ordinarily you couldn't tell, since we're next to a Vallarta (Mexican supermarket). And the menudo conceals that smell. But...here I am."
"Christ man, some job. How sweaty does your dong have to be for someone to use heat on it."
"Fuck if I know. Maybe, they like the feel"
"Maybe get one a' those powder dispensers."
"yeah, great, have them sprinkle that on their sack, watch the build up. I'm not running a bakery."
"Whatever man. You think it's clear though. A little passive aggressive."
"Whaddya' mean?"
"I think you imply that you should only dry yer hands but never specifically about drying their schvantz."
"Yeah, yer right. People are fucking idiots. Maybe get me another one that gives out the lewd acts in public are a violation of L.A. code."
"Oh yeah, we got a special on those. You can buy those in volume in this town."
"heh-heh good one, bro. Throw that one in too."
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