If you were to ask my classmates if they regret going to film school, I would say over half would agree to that. The others would say they had no regrets in life.
This business is godawful. I can't say it enough, as it's a slog through so much inside you THEN you have to attempt to make something people want to watch. I listen to a lot of podcasts where you hear people who had long careers. Specifically comedians, writers and directors. They cracked the code and were able to sustain a great life doing what they do. Thr oldest lady I hear about and still has the stomach for show business is 94 year old Rose Marie. I won't tell the story since you can Google it or watch my friend's new documentary about her. She is a ball of energy and has outlasted most everyone in her years. She still goes out to collect awards. To me, I should be ashamed to bitch and moan about my struggles. She just did it.
The restless mind wanders into dark scenarios that are as true as you allow them to be. We build up so a tragic end, no one ever begins. The journey is frought with self doubt anguish, pain and constant turmoil within. And guess what...the only standard you live up to is your own.
I think as I do get older, maybe this will sink in. That I don't need to eat the entire cake in one sitting and get ill. That not everyone thinks about your insecurities over their own. Without fear, what do we live to get beyond?
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