Tuesday, October 6, 2015

Delusional Desire Of Movie Makin'

I talked to an old friend about their short film recently. She'd mentioned that whenever I spoke of making movies, I didn't sound as passionately about it as other things in my life, like photography. The same could be said of her. Though she never studied the craft...anyone with a camera I suppose. My biggest gripe about movie making these days is the lack of craft. No one cares. Nor do they really go to lengths to learn. A lot of that could be because we don't have our heroes we look up to anymore. Our new generation isn't about holding talented craftsmen in reverence it's the attitude that they can do better...out of the gate. The arrogance is perplexing.

So here we are, in the social media world, constantly validating our garbage we can shoot on an iPhone and calling it art. Use to be this was reserved just for the serious "artist" now...everyone calls themselves that, and are shouted down if they're challenged. I recall being in undergrad art program being called out for my shitty art, and me feeling that they may have a point. That DOESN'T mean I didn't have the talent, or confidence. Some people believe if you ricochet off some criticism this is giving into negativity. Quite the opposite, you're discovering what you could be good at.

A great deal of being able to make art the way you'd like to make it, is to have a track record. Something that proves you have the ability. Or at least the resources. I think that's why I'm enamored with insane people who go into their movies with gusto. They never get sidetracked with things like...common sense. They certainly don't see the consequences of their action. And in a sense, you do have to have some form of mental illness to ignore all these and still tell your story. A younger person embraces this reckless behavior and is seldom rewarded for it. The older person weighs the options. Too bad for them though, since decisions that lack common sense go to the instinct and not to the intellect. The intellect understands the stupidity of action. Instinct ignores it. Or more accurately pushes it aside, since it's too intrusive.

One thing that creates this delusion, is the lack of perspective. I'd ask if her project had any turmoil which caused he to question her decision to want to direct in the future. She paused. Then glowingly rattled off all the wonderful contributions of good people. Then she went silent again. Except one person. When pressed, she shared with me the nightmare scenario in detail of the pain and anguish this one bad egg had on her project. After hearing this actresses behavior, to which I'd been familiar with, I simply said "she sounds pretty bad, but she isn't the worst you'll deal with." To which (and here is where we're deluded as storytellers) she defended "No. But next time I'll get to choose everyone I work with. I didn't cast her, I didn't like her and was bad from the beginning." Does this sound like something you'd like to gamble on. The likelihood you will deal with this is far greater than not. The professionals who do do this for a living have the capacity and workload in the near future to not be prima donnas. The rest are fiery opinionated dolts who don't share your vision, don't care, or more than likely just dumb. Now that may sound like I'm being completely negative to the entire production process. And more so negative towards someone's "dream" but we're talking about collaboration here. If someone like that is willing to jeopardize all you did to make this come together, without a shred of empathy for your situation, this isn't a I-choose-thee scenario, it's a reluctant battle with soldiers you have to motivate properly. I've told her I'd lucky enough to never encounter complete derailing insane people, but as a shooter...have seen some bad situations where a minor character takes over a production. For no other reason than they know (on a low budget) they have no other options.

So my question to her was...why subject yourself to this? A person who I believed to be kind hearted and a pacifist, driven to want to pummel a difficult person in the face. There is for sure a stubborn-ness ot people that is unexplained. I mean, why do I insist on shooting on film? Would it make my life easier if I just go digital and say fuck it? Probably. But here I am planning to shoot my next one on film again. Would anyone ever say this was a passion of mine? The answer to that may be to feel passion for the craft. It's something that is so removed from the "new generation." Even talking to my friend, she became hands off once the movie was shot. I recall being in undergrad upstairs in the attic of University Hall, a dark storage room with cluttered broken equipment. I pieced together a flatbed film editor from parts to make my short movie. 1/8" audio transferred to mag stock and synced it on a four gang synchronizer with a grease pencil, cold pizza and Coca-Cola, smoking Camel wides. I truly miss those pirate days.

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