"Twins" (1988)

Schwarzenegger is in the the new "Terminator: Genysis" movie. Pretty clever to spell Genesis differently, than say...the bible. It made me curious enough to revisit "Twins". And aside from some touching Danny DeVito, sludge DNA cocktail laments, this movie is pretty stupid. One thing, that I did love was Arnie's commitment to the ridiculous. This proved that he was perfect to do comedy...as the straight guy.

Danny DeVito plays Vincent Benedict, a street hustler and a despicable human being. Meanwhile Schwarzenegger plays his twin brother Julius. They have been separated at birth, one to live on a tropical island full of people pampering them. The other, to fend for himself in the mean streets of Los Angeles. It is the first time I've seen L.A. really portrayed as what it is. Scumbags who stroll Hollywood (not so much anymore but still...). Despite looking NOTHING alike, they share mannerism, which is an interesting way to show they come from the gene pool, silly but good enough. They are out to find their mother whom they discovered DIDN'T die in childbirth as they were first told. The result is zany, silly fun. Mostly that these two are so different, yet the same.

One of the most charming things about Schwarzenegger has been his inability to grasp how funny he is. He just says what he wants, tactless or not. That's pretty much most of Austria. They tell it like it is. Or how they perceive it. It's us 'Moricans who are offended by off-colored comments. So it's no surprise his charm wins over the luscious, and I mean I-miss-the-80's tight bod of Kelly Preston who plays the sister of Chloe Webb. I see what you did there, Reitman...a mirror to the twins. By the way, Preston has never looked hotter. Check her out in "Mischief" to get some real spank bank material.

Now what starts off as a gangster movie, turns into a road trip movie, that turns into a brotherly love story. It's almost as if they wanted to cram everything they love in the movie, because the core was so thin. They make frequent pauses to do odd things...like visit a honky tonk bar so they can show Julius how to dance. Or that Julius has never had sex before. These are distractions to extend the movie, which is fine. It does, feel...overall, and perhaps it's our society today that it's just too goofy to exist in the modern psyche.

There's been talk to make a second one, with Eddie Murphy as the third brother. Now, if Julius was the golden god, and Vincent came from the dregs of what was left over from Julius, what port hole do you think they can possibly play Eddie comes from that won't paint it to be awkwardly racist.

Just don't make it.