You Cannot Take It With You

The single most destructive thing that will always kill you from the center out is pride which is linked to ego.
There's a janitor that works at our office who made a really dumb mistake of mopping around sensitive hardware. He hit the hardware and the system went down. Which is when I proceeded to get upset with him. Obviously this damaged his ego. Since he went into defensive mode. The situation fixes itself simply for the guy to apologize for the mistake and move on. Instead, he refused, and that is my pet peeve.

While we were casual friends then, the guy won't really speak to me anymore. Guess what? There is a reason why you'll always be a janitor.

I know this because I battle this myself. Holding a grudge towards someone is dumb. I do it and have done my best to change this. Not that I need to reach out, but I quickly drop the anger or resentment or whatever. It does no adult any good to hold onto this and you only take it with you to the grave. Don't. Learn to keep your ego and pride at bay. Or better yet, destroy it.
I have a co-worker who is brilliant at that. He is over 50. Probably will die of a heart attack because he is the exact opposite. He doesn't allow people screaming at him to get to him (or so he says, most likely squashes it down into a ball in his gut). Though I've screamed things at him in a temper tantrum, he hasn't held it against me. I've discovered he's learned defense mechanism through his mother who was abusive.

I'm not sure what the good middle ground is but I'll tell you this, the janitor who holds on to his anger and ego bruised resentment towards me hasn't guided my life in the least. For the occasional dirty look or silence, I've continued onto my other endeavors in life. See, a lot of the ego is that their absence or silence will result in your world crumbling. That's laughable. But it does feed into their narcissism. To me, I took a lesson in what ego and pride can do. It keeps you working as a janitor at a place where you get screamed at for doing dumb things. It also occurred to me now, that the powers that are in charge (all not within his ethnicity) most likely treat him this way on a daily basis, and now, in his mind, he believes I see him in the same subservient position. I won't lie and tell you that I don't. Only because I've done this job (as a work study job at college, which is the single worse experience of janitorial work you can do, TRUST ME ON THIS) and realize it is real work, but at the same time, if I were to not show up, no one would notice, as someone else can easily do it.
To me, the ego/pride has kept him in this world for...most likely, the remainder of his life.
The two options we have are, use the resentment to fuel your life or use it to burn it all down.
It's truly up to you.