I, have, in my 43 years of life ever, ever, ever EVER hated a movie as much as I hate this movie. Every thought brings up more bile into my throat, as it is the single dumbest movie ever created by a major studio. That's impressive. It's so bad...I'm speechless. So I won't waste my spit on the plot, because it's recycled from "The Lost World." I will say all the Steven Spielberg hate corporation tropes are there. And then chuck in animal rights on top of that. While nice, in theory, they are MUCH more brutal and uncontrollable then a lion. Certainly less trainable than a chimpanzee.
There are so many glaring idiotic logic flaws. For example, how didn't the pterodactyl leave the fucking island? Answer...there is none. The two idiots return to retrieve the ol' friend Blue, a female raptor whom Owen Grady (Chris Pratt) trained. The evil corporation, isn't evil, but is...but isn't. So many stupid confusing things here. Because an entire infrastructure was built to house these new beast...in someone's home. Yes people...dinosaurs brought to some rich guy's home. I'm not joking.
God I hate this movie. And everyone involved. The script is total garbage fire greasy shit stain on society. It's so dumb, you feel terrible for the people locked into this, because you KNOW they're forced to regurgitate the orders of Master Universal Studios. Ugh. It's dumb, dumb DUMB. In fact, there is a "Get Out" style auction that made me laugh uncontrollably.
This movie is awful. I could spend another paragraph telling you the stupidity and boredom it rained down on me, but look...kids can go for it. Not sure why, other than their brains are dumb. But it's great to keep them distracted.
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