Why You Don't Succeed In Hollywood...

Allow me to be arrogant for a second.

I’ve in contact with a girl lately. Not interested in her, that I’d want to bang her. Tattoos aren’t my thing. And she has a boyfriend, that…by the looks of the dude, is more hipster than I can stand. We got along online because we are both from Ohio. Sharing Ohio quips really bonds people. No bullshit. 

Anyway…

I was more interested in getting a different look for my portfolio. You think finding a model is easy in Los Angeles. It’s not. For a few reasons. Fucking mashers. Guys who find women who they just want to fuck. Whilst this is A reason for getting into photography, for the love of Christ, you have to at least have the skill to photograph. I HATE these people. Because they clog the pipeline between me finding talent. The  models do as much investigation as to who they work with as much as we do. At least I really hope so. There was one that fresh into town. I mean, by fresh, I mean she was still in her car, showed up alone and worked with me. I couldn’t believe how brazenly ballsy that is. And extremely dangerous. I am not the kind that does bad things to women. But…Jesus…the odds were against her that there are dudes who are that type of guy. Especially in this very shady field.

So I hit her this Ohio chick for a modeling thing. Trade for print. She was really excited. We sort of lost contact for a while, until I saw that she was modeling for a clothing line. This piqued my interest. So I contacted her again.

The photos that were taken were EXTREMELY amateur. It looked like taken from a cheap digital camera. Really shitty quality. I’d post it here, but I don’t own it. Neither would I want to give this person any more ink. But, I was shocked how bad it was. However, I saw that this girl seemed fearless. I like that…fearlessness. Fearless is that thing where models just are very comfortable in their skin. You can see it. You can feel it. And you do so very little directing. They know. But know enough where they don’t stiffen up. I love fearless.

So I contacted her about collaborating. The following message I received from her is that that clothing line already has a photographer so they weren’t looking for anyone new. I’m not sure if there was some miscommunication, but IN NO WAY was I soliciting myself to photograph their wears and usurp who was already working with them. BUT if I may be as bold to say…YES YES YES, emphatically YES you do need someone to do your images right. As it is…they are flat digital garbage. I wish I could present them here, but again, this is dangerous territory. The attitude I got was basically “we don’t need you to photograph, I know what we’re doing and we’re fine. So fuck off.” Lady, your product shots are NOT fine and this isn’t good for your portfolio. Guaranteed. I guess…no one likes to hear you’re subpar. And I’m sure I came off as criticizing their images. But, I was stuck in trying to tell her that her poses were great, the images…TERRIBLE.

This brings me to my point. I realize why this girl, whom I’ve read frequently how broke she is and that her career hasn’t gotten anywhere. It’s because she’s inflexible and, quite honestly, delusional. Her pride, much like a LOT of us in this town, is debilitating her. I get it. I’ve been told my images sucked. Only to fire back that they’re idiots and that if I were to judge them by their work, I’d question the source. You know what? I was completely wrong. My images back then did suck. And you can really evaluate yourself more clearly when you have to pick out the ones that are made when your career is on the line. This is when the moment of clarity comes in. When you can be your most honest.

Now, I figure at this point, and where the arrogance comes in “Bitch, if a guy who gets paid to what to do your portfolio, you should be on your hands and knees groveling for me to set it up. You should be pestering me like a little sister. “ Above all, you should be so grateful, it’s short of offering to suck me off in some dark disgusting bathroom in Echo Park. Alright, I may’ve gone too far. BUT…

…whatever it was, I wasn’t expecting a “…I got it. I understand what you’re saying. We’ll keep doing what we’re doing.” Right. Let me know how that works out when you turn mid-30’s. There are people who just never help themselves out.

I’m not saying to even work with me. But I’m saying this is indicative of a LOT of failed people in this town wanting to work in entertainment. They just don’t know that when an opportunity presents itself, you do whatever you can to exploit it. That’s how stars become stars. I’ve made this terrible mistake. Not only did I turn down opportunities to keep shooting, I’ve bad-mouthed people in the process. There is no return from that.

The reason why you don't succeed in the entertainment, I've come to realize, you don't hold on to your opportunities like they were gold.