Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Saint Patrick's Day was a big thing in Cincinnati. Even though it was a German town. It had massive parade to celebrate the occasion. I think it was another reason to be drunk. Cincy has a way of finding ways to stay drunk. I have Irish family members. My niece is half-Irish so naturally she's going to be fiery and obnoxious as she gets older. I think so is my nephew. Who is really subdued. You almost have to hit him with a tazer to see if he responds. Or he's just too cool for school. Which I felt I was (I wasn't). The celebration seems to have dwindled. Or perhaps it's because I'm in queer nation Los Angeles. You would think this shit-ass town would embrace a reason to get fucked up. So here's the thing...if you want the fruits out here to get behind it again (pun intended) make it St. Gay Patty's Day. No one...and I mean NO ONE loves a parade more than the gays. Also they drink a lot. Win...win! Gay Patty's Day would consist of stuffing a potato up your ass and the Corned Beef Hole Sac Race. That would mean you suck corned beef out of a hole and try to sprint 40 yards. Unfortunately, the Catholics probably would be up in arms about this. Since they don't recognize homosexuality. Although most priests molest young boys. You see the conflict here. Anyways, hope you "get your Irish on." A hilarious euphemism for face-down-ass-up drunkeness.