First off, Happy New Years everyone.
Yeah, first time I went out in a very long time. I decided to hang with my friends downtown. Went to a bar drank some drinks. I took a friend I'd met in Cincinnati. I developed feeling for her which was a huge mistake, since most women who come out here are mental. But, my folks actually introduced us. It was in Cincy at my Dad's friend's restaurant that she was the hostess. I remember her vividly as she stood out from the Asian faces. Caucasian, a little on the tall side. blue eyes, weird. I got her email and phone and I kept in contact. But then, she disappeared.
Fast forward three years later and she makes it out to Los Angeles. She emailed me. And we eventually meet up. She is a LOT of fun. Good sense of humor. Wild child. I didn't know how wild until later.
We hung out a few days later in Santa Monica. It was a great time. It'd been a while since I laughed. She was so much fun. We were to spend New Years together.
New Years. I got tanked. And hung out at my friend James's place. James is a a great dude. Photographer, like yours truly. Well, we went out to a bar. I cleared a $100 tab. And headed back to his studio. I fell asleep in his waiting room. His apartment is also a studio. When I woke up, I saw my friend posing nude for James. Not that it bothered me, but...it bothered me. We had some drinks. And I said things I wish I had not said. Then we went back to my car, which is where all hell broke loose. I professed how much I had cared for her. And she shot me down. Absolutely pissed that I would attempt to "control" her. I told her how much I disliked her doing nudes. I had no say in the matter. It wasn't my business and she can do what she pleases. She ended up crashed out on my couch. In the morning, I did it. Yes...folks...stupid as it sounds, I did it. I told her that I was in love with her.
I know, it's stupid. It's shit you wouldn't even write in a BAD script. But I did it. And she just shot me down--HARD. Yeah, most people say crap to say crap. But her schtick was that she wasn't in a place to fall in love. B.S. NO ONE is in a place to fall in love. But, and a HUGE BUT, for the right person, ANYONE can fall in love. So that's where ended. So you would think.
She left my apartment, but was lost as to where her car was. I walked out to move my car. I caught her on her way to her car. And I thought (yes, folks, this is embarrassing) maybe she just needs a little lip magic. I pinned her to her car and attempted to kiss her. "I just need to know" I told her. COMPLETELY clumsy and off. She turned to and fro missing my lips. She clearly did not want to be kissed. And that friends, is where it ended. Just sad sad sad stupid guy who thought more of a relationship than what was there. It saddens me and makes me laugh at the same time. Our friendship is over. You can't be friends and know one person feels more than the other. It hurts. I had such a good time with her and she just has no filter. But, it's done now. I already miss her. What's-her-name. It just doesn't play out like you see in the movies.
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